What is the deal with Men’s Airport Bathroom Behavior!?

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WARNING: Rant! 🙂 I am always astonished at men’s behavior when using the airport bathrooms. I’ve seen some weird stuff over the years – and at this point, nothing really surprises me. For one, there is a complete and utter disregard for hand washing. I don’t get it. So many guys simply don’t wash their hands after doing their business – and not just the easy business. The serious business too. I can sort of get not washing your hands after taking a leak (although, still gross), but after the other job…come on!

This reminds me of a cartoon I saw back in 1997 while at Camp Lejeune, NC. It showed a young, arrogant LT in a bathroom w/ a young, but salty Lance Corporal. The LCpl didn’t wash his hands after he was done, and the LT scolded him: “LCpl, didn’t your mother teach you to wash your hands after using the head [bathroom]?” The LCpl responds; “No sir. She taught me not to piss on my hands.”

I am also amazed at the number of people talking on their phone while in the bathroom. And not just their buddies. We are talking customers, their bosses, their wives. And again, not just the simple business. I’ve heard dudes seated behind a closed door chatting their boss up while blowing it up. WTH!

Men’s bathrooms in general are not known for their cleanliness (we have to aim!), but man, some of the stuff you see is mind boggling. What happened!?! Is that blood, too? How did you get hair, there!?!

And while we are talking about men’s bathrooms, what is with the restrooms that don’t have dividers between urinals. Seriously…get w/ it. And how about those hand dryers. I doubt having some hand towels is going to literally ruin the environment. Hand dryers (especially the full insertion ones by Dyson) are a stupid invention. Like I want water spraying all over the place from some tepid stream of air that will only half dry my hands.

And don’t get me started on the touch-less faucets which are a great invention WHEN THEY WORK! I’ve moved through like 7 of them before getting one to kick on.

And how about making a bathroom stall big enough that I can actually fit my luggage in w/out  me w/out having to climb onto the toilet and do a yoga pose to get into it. And while we are making more room, how about widening the entrances to most of the terminal bathrooms so that two people w/ luggage can walk in/out at the same time. Ever tried to squeeze into an SLC airport bathroom? Sheesh.

See my gripey post on Dallas Love Airport’s bathroom sizes and the fact it’s the only place there is a line in a men’s bathroom!

And by the way, don’t talk to me in the bathroom. In fact don’t even make eye contact. I don’t want to chat w/  you. Seriously.

I am just going to leave the Sen. Larry Craig story alone, btw. I got nothing for that. And maybe I am not European enough, but the all-gender bathrooms are a little odd. Just saying.


Ok…rant over. You may go about your day now. WHEW. I feel better now.

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3 comments on “What is the deal with Men’s Airport Bathroom Behavior!?

  1. faeriefiles53

    heeheee, great humorous rant. Yes, airport restrooms need more space in the stalls. I like the mixed gender bathrooms, seems like they have a wee bit more space in them and in general. are cleaner. Maybe the multi-sex sinks work as social pressure to wash up, clean up etc.? I ran a health club for six years and it’s been my experience that the women’s restrooms, lockers and showers are far more disgusting than the men’s. When given a choice I always choose the men’s room.


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